together.

I have realized lately, as my good friend Maggie and I discussed, that I have never been in a situation, in my entire life, where I was excited about government or a time where I found myself within the majority opinion. Since I was old enough to understand, all I have ever known is the Bush Administration and it is such an incredible feeling to feel a part of a larger group that feels the same. We will fight poverty, together; we will fight against those destroying the environment together; we will finish these wars and take care of the brave now fighting when they return home, together; we will make sure that all citizens have health care available to them, together; we will fight for civil rights and equality, together; we will better our education system and take better care of our educators, together; we will use diplomacy to communicate with the rest of the world and restore our global legitimacy, together. And this includes those who did not vote for our now president-elect as well, any Christian, Muslim, Jew, Atheist, Gay, Straight, Black, White, Hispanic, Poor, Rich, Republican, Democrat, Male, Female, Old, Young person, because I feel most of these issues are concerns for every single person on the face of this planet.

I know that this may seem cheesy to some, but now I am willing to work and fight and try because I feel that I can. It will not be easy and I know that all I am hoping to accomplish will not happen immediately, but eventually. I will leave you with this:


“We have been told we cannot do this by a chorus of cynics who will
only grow louder and more dissonant in the weeks to come. We've been
asked to pause for a reality check. We've been warned against
offering the people of this nation false hope.

But in the unlikely story that is America, there has never been
anything false about hope. For when we have faced down impossible
odds; when we've been told that we're not ready, or that we shouldn't
try, or that we can't, generations of Americans have responded with a
simple creed that sums up the spirit of a people, Yes we can.

It was a creed written into the founding documents that declared the
destiny of a nation, Yes we can.

It was whispered by slaves and abolitionists as they blazed a trail
toward freedom through the darkest of nights, Yes we can.

It was sung by immigrants as they struck out from distant shores and
pioneers who pushed westward against an unforgiving wilderness, Yes we can.

It was the call of workers who organized; women who reached for the
ballot; a President who chose the moon as our new frontier; and a King who took us to the mountaintop and pointed the way to the Promised Land.

Yes we can to justice and equality. Yes we can to opportunity and
prosperity. Yes we can heal this nation. Yes we can repair this
world. Yes we can.

And we will remember that there is something happening in America; that we
are not as divided as our politics suggests; that we are one people;
we are one nation; and together, we will begin the next great chapter
in America's story with three words that will ring from coast to
coast; from sea to shining sea - Yes. We. Can.”

freeeeeeeeee.

i just went for a ride around my neighborhood in my underwear.

thank you mr. 'second wind' for finally showing up. i've been waiting on you all year.

a bag of hammers

"shake shake shake shake the frame of this house, distress the wood make it shout."

My home is in and out and full of refugees and school is school and work is enjoyable and my bike is making a funny noise and my computer still doesnt have a battery and my room is finished and i have to wake up early everyday now and i'm tired and i want to sleep all day and not feel guilty about it and i want to dance and read and lay in my hammock forever.

4604 duval

jordan allison and i have moved into our new home at 4604 duval street and hyde park is so perfect. we had a huge party last night and went through many gallons of punch and an entire keg of lonestar. jesus!

besides that, i barely made it through the summer semesters of arabic and now i am up to my neck in school work again. i am taking lots of arabic, islamic theology, and weather and climate. they all seem as though they will be tough but worth my time.

i am also feeling a bit asexual lately, i can't remember that last time i lusted after someone without alcohol in me--bummer.

i'm tired, g'night.

worn.

i am completely and undeniably exhausted. i wish that i could say it was because i was up late every night riding bikes around the city or maybe even because i had a little too much to drink and was out dancing until people were leaving for work and school.

while i love studying arabic and i reap the rewards of that work everyday, i am simply exhausted. this entire summer has been like one continuous finals' week and i can't bare to think that i have four more weeks of grinding this out before i have to move and get right back to all of it. on top of this particular stress, a few other things have been plaguing me, like that i miss my family and that i am extremely lonely. you can only spend so much time by yourself, doing homework and eating and sleeping alone in a house that is almost always empty before it gets to you. and it is not like i don't go out and do things, i totally went and saw the dark knight this afternoon, but i didn't really get to talk to anyone and even if i did i feel as if i'd have nothing to talk about... unless you want to talk about arabic homework, which of course is the reason i couldn't hang out after the movie.

woo hoo. al-wajib al-arabiyya, here i come.

crash.

i crashed on my bike today, my whole body hurts.  i didn't cry, but i wanted to.

Al-arabii.

Ahlan wa sahalan.

It has been a long time since my last post and there probably will not be any more all summer. I have started my intensive summer arabic program and it is taking over my life.  Class Monday-Friday 9-noon and Monday & Wednesday 4-5pm, and I also have at least five hours of waajid (homework) every night (if not more!).   Therefore, the posts are on hold until the end of the summer.  

Maasalama,

CE

bed ridden.

This is my friend Scott the day he taught me to play DDR at the arcade a little ways up north.  I remember we took the bus and goodness did I have the hugest crush on him.  We went to the wok'n'roll for lunch and then it was DDR time.  Scott is really really really good at DDR.  I miss him a lot even though he only lives up the street and technically I could see him whenever I want.

He is also currently sick.  I have been so too since Saturday.  Strep/"possibly mono" says the doctor at the clinic after 2 hours of waiting and an hour and a half of throat swabbing and blood tests.  I've been in bed and waddling around the house in my sleeping clothes for the past few days, taking my anti-biotic but not really feeling better.  I have another appointment Wednesday morning with my real doctor and I hopefully will feel well enough to start summer school on Thursday.  If I could get over the general bad mood I'm in from being sick I would be really excited about finally starting Arabic.  I need something to do before I go fucking crazy.

Also, not being able to do things for yourself really sucks. I miss my mom.

Welcome Summer.

Andrea and I, when I had pink-ish hair.

I have just moved into my summer place.  Austin is sunny, hot, and beautiful.  My room will soon have an Andrea living in it as well.  Matresses and palettes on the floor, a ceiling fan, and a single chair. $275 a month, all bills paid, not bad at all.  I am exhausted from all of this moving, but at ease.  WOOHOO!!!

Did I mention that I saw Radiohead play in Houston this past Saturday.  It was wonderful!

weary.

Allison, readying herself.

Again, I did not rest last night, and I am now a bit weary.  Also, I am a bit contemplative.  Oh, you know, pondering the ambiguity of language and time and the existence of God and the origin of the universe and shit.  And shit. 

reward.

Dustin, happy to be at the beach.

Today I was notified that I would be the recipient of a $1,000 Religious Studies scholarship. Horaaaayy.  Also, I currently have an "A" in Government, which means I do not have to take the final! Horaaaaaay. Plus, I will soon no longer reside in Jester. Horaaaaaay.

I have lots of research paper things to do, eeek, and a BIO exam to study for (and no matter what I do I will have a "C" in that class... not much motivation there).  But, I will be done with this semester by Monday at 9am.  

water droplets.

Belinda.

Luis.

Yesterday evening we rode our bikes home from Kirby Lane in the rain.  When you wear glasses the little droplets build up on the lens and it makes it hard to see. I have so much research/ studying to do.  It is unreal.  I also have to move soon.  I don't like the act of moving.

courtesy.

This is the beautiful Hallie; she works at CVS.

Well, unfortunately, tonight went as expected.  Well, mostly. 

I'm nearly positive I knew before hand what he would say, but I had to hear it from him-- I hate it when other people speak for me so I had to give him the same courtesy.  I told him very simply that I fancied him and had no idea why or to what extent, but just that I did.  That was probably one of the harder things I've ever done, even though it was so simple.  I am really very proud of myself.

So, to put it plainly, he did not feel similarly.  But, he was very kind to me, as he usually is.  Le sigh.  I am just really disappointed, but I will live and he will live and we will be good friends and this, whatever it is/was, will fade into the history of Me 

and that will be that. 

While I do love all of this excitement, I think I may lay low for a bit.  Move back into the realm of auto-piloting.  It will not be so bad.  I could use the rest.  

exhale.

Brandon and Erin a few years back.  My first roll of 35mm 

that wasn't a disposable camera.

So, today is a bit difficult.  The fear of regret is motivating me to do some things I would not usually do.  I hope that the rejection I perceive to be in my near future will not suck too bad.  Who knows, maybe this will be a liberating experience.  And if not, at least it will be over before the weekend.

Roark.

Dustin took this!!  Me and my chariot! (I'm hilarious, admit it.  or sleep deprived?)

Today I took a bike ride at sunrise after staying up all night working on things.  Things being a SOC paper, BIO homework and a bazillion pages of reading.

OH MY GAH. my route: up 21st to guad. then down to 40th and then right there to hit speedway and somehow make it to the east mall at 7am to see the huge fountain explode into action!! SHITTT!! then to MLK and over to the DF field to explore parking lots and then down my FAVORITE hill on campus.  WHEW!  staying up all night has never been so stellar!

i know i may regret this at 5pm when my last class ends and i can't even make it all the way back to my room to crash, but right now I am in love with being awake all of the time, and also my bike (his name is Roark!).

release.

Danny and Maya, lovers and comic strip drawers.

Today was one of those uneasy days.  I do not get overwhelmed very often, but today was right for it.  

I am calm now, but unable to sleep.  

ninny muffin.

This is Maya, the most resilient human on the planet.

My 4th grade mentee.

The drunken couple.  They were very worried about the well-being of their diet soda child.

Things are well.  A few notes:

-I got to spend an evening with my sister and nieces; it was wonderful.  My sister is the best mother ever.    -I miss my mom/dad/bro.  Taylor is having a big surgery soon. I am worried about him.    -I miss Jared terribly, and write him (annoyingly) often.

-After these next two weeks are over, I promise I will come home for a week to visit.    -I am a ninny muffin.  Really.

tough shit.

Sometimes you just have to be tough.

I have been up for 33 hours and have at least 5 more to go.

I am actually having a really good day, though. And by day I mean the past 33 hours.  I went to two days worth of classes, and have been hella productive (written a SOC paper, read 7 SOC articles, read 3 ROME CIV articles, completed a scholarship app., studied for my government test tomorrow and completed BIO homework).  Micah and I went to Epoch for nearly 12 hours... man.  I also have picked out new wheels for my bike; they are going to be mustard yellow.  They will look so "fly" with my burgundy frame!  SHIT!!

simple things.

This is my beautiful friend Angela.  

I want to be just like her, basically.

So, things are kind of goofy nuts right now.  

By goofy nuts I mean: I am making decisions!! WHAAA!!!

1) i will learn Arabic and understand Islam because I care about 

the injustices the Islamic people have suffered.  

I will help to make it right.

2) i will bike forever. 

3) 35mm film sucks & 120mm (and 220) film kicks.

4) group projects, that require papers, i will avoid forever.

5) i will always wear sandals, even if they do tend to smell.

6) kindnessessity.  7) i fucking love hiking.

8) if i want to, i should still love people, 

even if they are incapable of loving me in return.

9) i will give her space if she needs it because i love her.

10) i will tell the truth.

These are all pretty simple things, 

but I thought them through very carefully. 

we're writing our past right now.

Yesterday, sigh...  I wonder how the hell I lived this long without a day like that.  It was my 19th birthday yesterday, but that was the least significant part about the day.  I decided to sleep through my one class yesterday to catch up on sleep.  Upon waking up I'm sure I ate, but can't remember where, and then Dustin and I went to Precision Camera to get a lens cap and a UV filter for my newest camera (and to pick up prints and to drop off a million rolls of film).   Then a little studying happened and an RSSC meeting ( I adore Angela and Chris because they understand the things I like because they like them also), where I discovered Orangina-- the best beverage EVER.  Then many friends accompanied me to dinner at Clay Pit, and there is mango cheesecake awaiting me in the refrigerator.  Pre-dinner I had a conversation, via cellular phone, with my parents (whom I love and miss greatly).  I told them about the letter I received from the Arabic Flagship Program, which invited me to study Arabic this summer at the University with the possibility of a Fellowship beginning the second summer semester (if I performed well).  Being offered a Fellowship would mean that the University (or rather, the federal government) would pay for all of my Arabic coursework and study abroad time in Egypt (I would do a summer in between Junior and Senior year and a full year post-senior year coursework but pre-graduation).  This would mean SO MUCH MONEY and the opportunity to study with the best Arabic professors in the country!  SHIT!!

Anyhow, so my parents agreed that I should remain in Austin this summer to take a shot at this, so as of yesterday I am living in Austin this summer.  Whew. I need to find a place to live, and I've never been more excited.  

Later in the evening I had the privilege of seeing Scout Niblett play at Emo's.  This woman is amazing and just solidified the greatness of my day. I can, without hesitation, say this was the best concert experience of my life.  If you have not heard of her you should begin by listening to "Do you want to be buried with my people?"  After the show it was pouring outside and Andrea, Dustin, Steven, and I barreled down an abnormally barren 6th street to try and find the e-bus (which we found).  It was one of those moments where you are so happy to just be running down the street with people you love that you forget that it's freezing and wet or that maybe you should not run with your mouth open.  Upon returning to campus we had a puddle fight.  Gosh, I wish I was better at description.

As Scout says, "It's so fun to see me being me alongside you."

bike brigade.

Yesterday I received my new camera in the mail, hooray e-bay!  It is a Kowa Six, nothing too fancy, but I'm in love with it/ still figuring it out.  Also yesterday, I rode my bike, A LOT. I was gone with Besty for nearly 2 hours and then took a small bike brigade journey to I <3 Video to return a late movie with Fang, Dustin, and Danny.  The weather has been amazing lately, and I plan to spend the majority of the weekend on my bike-- and doing research projects...

bug kingdom.

This is Rachael, she was reading to Micah and I about REM cycles as we built the bug kingdom-- the best bug kingdom ever.

This is Micah and his chill ass mutha-fuckin bike.  He was the co-builder of the bug kingdom, if I remember correctly. (and this photo looks like shit compared to its near state of awesomeness pre-scan)

I am currently working on a research project that will explore the inherent conflicts between Jehovah's Witnesses' religious practices and a democratic/pluralistic society.  I previously lacked knowledge on the subject, now I know more than I ever believed to even exist about the Witnesses.  Yay knowledge.

over lunch.

Over lunch today the three persons sitting behind us were having a conversation regarding their futures.  One of the males was describing to his peers how the acquiring of a wife would lead to children and that those subsequent children would "become anchors that would anchor [him] away from happiness."  

woah.

blue-ness.

These for my two favorites, Andrea and Dustin.

This is my roomie, Allison.  We have gotten pretty good at living together. This is my favorite bra that she wears. 

I am not a "photographer," but I like photographing.  It helps the memories remain vivid, and it's good exercise for your pointer finger. This is here to tell the story of my life, and how things are.